That night changed everything
by deadweight
Summary: This is my first attempt at a skins fanfic so here goes nothing! The story is from Naomi's POV and it picks up right at the end of episode 9. Not sure about the rating but hopefully I got it right? Thanks for reading
1. Chapter 1

That night changed everything. She was so brave, so incredibly brave. It made me proud. The feeling felt like a lump in my throat and threatened to undo me completely. I'd always considered Emily to be so tiny and fragile. Something to be protected, but tonight she was different. Tonight she was suddenly the Emily I had snatched glimpses of in the past, cast out of her sisters suffocating shadow to finally lift her head up high. She made me feel like I should be stronger, could be if I would only be brave like she had asked me to be.

The truth is I did feel brave tonight. Admittedly I had been driven to the dance by my anger and bitterness at the idea of my Emily in JJ's fumbling hands! I couldn't get the image of them out of my head and it filled me with sickness. But I wasn't angry with her, not really. I was angry with myself.

Did he deserve her more than I did? I hadn't exactly been kind to her. I had no right to be mad at her for sleeping with him after all she wasn't mine. No, but it felt like she was. It was a hard pill to swallow. Acceptance didn't come easily to me. It wasn't until somebody else wanted her that I realised how much I did.

So I went to the dance to fight for her. Originally anyway. But seeing them on the steps all neatly packaged like a pair of stepford wives brought up too much in me. I reverted back to the old me. Blunt and head strong. It was meant to be a brilliant performance but all I did was show how much I really cared about her.

I can still picture her on the floor with clumps of Katie's auburn hair in her hands. All that rage. The girl would make a good activist one-day, with the right teacher. It didn't matter that all those faces surrounded her. Emily had, had enough and finally she was telling the world that she wouldn't be walked on anymore. The message was like an arrow straight to my head.

I breathed in. 'Be brave' I told myself. The words were repeated in my head like a mantra.

'I love...her' She had extended her hand, briefly, in my direction, her eyes meeting mine so dark they were almost chocolate. She loved me. For all my flaws, despite my crazy cult house she still wanted me and somehow it was enough. It was enough to drive away all the insecurities, all the doubts. I held my hand out to her and waited patiently for her to come to me. When she did all eyes were on us. I could feel them burning in to me but it didn't matter. I smiled at her and out we went, our exit marked by scatterings of applause.

"I love you too," I said to nobody but her and the cool summer air. She seemed to know it.

We walked back to mine in virtual silence. Content just to hold hands.

"Get through the crowd and say nothing. Do not engage anyone in conversation and keep your eyes to the ground." I had warned her as we stood outside my house, music spilling out onto the streets and the silhouette's of people dancing through the windows.

She blinked back at me before breaking in to a grin "You make them sound dangerous"

"Do you want to spend your prom night listening to the wonders of hemp?"

"No"

"Exactly. Anyway I have other things in mind"

"Really?" She almost purrs. "Like what"

"You'll see"

When I kissed her I could feel her entire body sigh with relief. Her hands had snaked around my back, hugging me to her tightly. As the kiss deepened I felt my mind switch off and my emotions take over. I kissed her almost desperately, my fingers pulling at the thin fabric of her slip. It wasn't enough. I needed her. Needed to be closer to her, to feel her. I slipped off her 'dress' throwing it to the floor with a grunt.

"Let me..." She began to say but I brought my lips back to hers cutting her off mid sentence. I ran my hands over the silky expanse of her skin. "I want to feel you," She whispered in to my ear. When I looked in to her eyes they were filled with lust. I complied instantly, unzipping my dress and letting it fall to the floor with a rush of air.

I led her to the bed and we slipped under the covers fitting into each other perfectly.

When the sun had begun to creep up at the lazy hour of the early morning I'd cupped her face in my hands, the tips of my thumbs stroking her cheeks. Her eyes had been struggling to stay open. "Go to sleep" I'd whispered kissing her eyelids.

"I don't want to" Her voice was hoarse, her words sleepy.

"I'll still be here when you wake up" I assured her, moving a strand of red hair away from her eyes. "I promise"

She'd smiled and snuggled into my neck.

Minutes later she had fallen asleep her features framed with a peacefulness that threatened to close my eyes. She was beautiful. I'd always thought so and now it was about to change everything.


	2. Chapter 2

Do you want a fairytale ending? Of course. That's the problem with society today. We'd rather hide from the facts instead of facing the ugly truth. We want a nice sugar coated world without injustice and pain. It's nice to look away isn't it? Luckily I'm cynical before my time so I didn't expect things to run smoothly but Emily, poor sweet Emily, thought things would just fall into place.

To begin with we laid low. We spent nights in a row staying up, till the sun rose in the sky, just talking for hours. We got to know each other without any fear of me acting like an idiot. I learnt that she's deathly afraid of moths, that she hates it when men cry and that she loves the way my lips curl. 'It makes you look suspicious'

I told her that I might just be a teeny tiny bit afraid of failure, just a tiny bit, that my Mum had raised me as a strict vegan for years never knowing that I stole sausage rolls and ham sandwiches from other kids packed lunch boxes. I whispered later on that I loved her chocolate coloured eyes but was afraid of everything they could make me do.

Then there were the little games that only lovers get to play.

'When did you know?'

'How did you feel when I stormed into your room?'

'How long?'

Emily especially liked to play this game. She loved hearing about all the nights I had spent tossing and turning in my bed thinking about those hasty kisses. I liked hearing about the nights she had spent thinking about me too and teased her about it until she was red in the face.

I liked those days. It was nice getting to know her before everybody else waded in.

Needless to say Emily's Mum didn't take it very well. I can still hear her shouting through the letterbox 'Emily Fitch you are not to leave with _that_ girl. Do you hear me' Emily pretended not to, just gripped the sleeve of my shirt and pulled me along.

The more Emily tried to get her Mum to accept us the harder she fought to drive me away. She'd be there at the window 'curtain twitching' and giving me the evil eye. Recently she's taken to calling me a pariah. I told Emily I thought it was catchy and that I'd never had a nickname before.

"Are you going out again Emilykins? I don't think they allow PARIAHS at the swimming pool" She'd smiled victoriously while Emily had groaned in defeat.

"I think that's piranhas actually" I'd grinned back sweetly.

Emily's Dad happily chooses to live in denial. If Emily brings it up he laughs and ruffles her hair. On the occasion that she feels brave and tries to have it out with him he makes a list of facts denouncing her sexuality. Namely the fact that were 'a bunch of girls' and not a genuine pair of 'lezzas'. However he always greets me as 'Emily's friend' and never once tried to put my coat in the bin.

Katie tries as best as she can. It's hard to make room for anybody else when you're that self-absorbed. Some days we actually talk, usually in large groups with minimal conversation. Other days she tries her best to keep us apart and it becomes a 'her or me' situation. She's lucky I'm in love because I have a really nasty competitive streak.

So this is our life so far. A relationship that at the heart of things is happy and blossoming into something pretty special but also has all the drama of a pregnant teen and her barely of age sweetheart.

Today is a happy day. We lay on my bed. Emily on her back with her eyes directed towards the ceiling while I rest my head against her stomach. "I can hear what you had for lunch"

"No you can't"

"Can too! It says you had a chicken and mayonnaise sandwich" I could picture the smile on her face. "Free range"

"We had lunch together" She deadpans.

"Fine" I mutter, mock annoyed. I move higher up to her chest snuggled between her breasts. "Bet I can hear what your heart says"

"Go on then" She urges, bringing her hand to the back of my head to idly stroke my hair. I press my ear to her heart and immediately hear the persistent thud, thud.

"It says that you're in love"

"You already know that! Your full of shit"

"Give me a chance! Jesus" I bring my ear back "Your in love. It's your first time and your happy. The happiest you've ever been. Apparently you're in love with a genius. Your heart wants you to know that you are one lucky girl, which is why you should...Hold on a second" She giggles and the sound vibrates through me. "Give me a massage? Wow that speaks volumes I think," She laughs loudly, playfully batting me with her hands. "Excuse me! What is this violence?" I ask outraged. I sit up and hold her hands above her head. "Arguing with your own heart"

"Your an idiot" She tells me through her laughter. It flushes her cheeks, turning them a delightful pink and I soften slightly forgetting my game plan. "What?" She asks.

"Your beautiful" I reply, watching as she frowns. "You are!" I kiss her nose and her frown slowly disappears. She lifts her head up and brings her mouth to mine, soft familiar lips greeting me with warmth. Her tongue slips between my lips meeting mine with a jolt of electricity that never goes away no matter how many times we kiss. Once we kissed all night to see if it made any difference. Just for the sake of experimentation mind.

The banging that begins against the front door doesn't rouse us at first. Everybody's welcome at this house! I stay on top of her as it grows louder and louder. "Should you get that?" She asks.

"Why? Everyone I want is right here everyone else can fuck off" We both laugh.

I hear my mum open the door. "Hello" She greets the noisy person in that singsong 'join hands and heal the world' way that she greets everyone.

"Hello are you Naomi's Mother?"

We both bolt upright at the sound of Emily's Mum's voice. "Shit!" Emily exclaims, scrabbling for her clothes that lay strewn around the bedroom.

"What are you doing?" I ask taking the t-shirt she holds in her hands and chucking it across the room. "Mum can deal with it"

"What if she comes up here?"

"She won't" I assure her. "She's probably come to expose our relationship"

"Oh god" Emily's face is a picture of terror.

"Ems my Mum is dying for a daughter that's in a minority. Chill. She's all about the free love. She'll probably just congratulate us" I assure her.

"Oh god" She repeats flopping down on the bed. "Your poor Mum"

"If she can handle evangelists she can handle your Mum" I respond dryly.

"How can this not bother you? You're just lying there naked, with your nakedness for everyone to see!" I watch as she winds herself up. I shouldn't find it cute but I really, really do.

"You mean you? Look if it bothers you that much we can hide on the landing and snoop" I try to placate her and it seems to work.

Minutes later were hiding on the landing in nothing but dressing gowns.

"Would you like some green tea?"

"No thanks. I won't be here for long"

"Well now that's a shame"

"Hmm. I'm not sure how to phrase this Miss Campbell"

"Are you sure about the tea?"

"I'm sure. The thing is...I thought I should bring this to your attention...It's just that your daughter and my daughter are involved in a very unsavory affair"

Emily grips the landing until her hands are white. I place a hand over hers my fingertips stroking her soft skin.

"An affair?" My Mum asks and I'm surprised by the shock I hear in her voice.

"Yes. Together. Both of them together."

"Having an affair?"

"Miss Campbell our daughters are committing lesbian acts do you understand"

"And your daughter is in a committed relationship?"

"With your daughter!"

I can hear Mum sigh. "Well thank goodness for that"

"Excuse me?"

"Well Emily makes Naomi so happy. I'd hate for it to be a seedy affair. Love should always be honest don't you think?"

"I think love should always be normal actually" Emily's Mum replies and we hear the sharp scraping of her chair. "I hoped that we might be able to come to some sort of agreement to keep them apart but I can see this is a battle I'm going to be facing alone"

"Don't you think it's normal to want your daughter to be happy?" My mum suggests.

"I'm not listening to this. You've done this. This is all your fault. I hope you're happy with yourself" You can hear her spitting the words with such venom that Emily meets my wide eyes with wide eyes of her own.

"I am happy, because they're happy. Will you be satisfied when you push her away!" My mum shouts out of the door, slamming it shut. "Crickey"


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks to everyone who left reviews. I'm really glad your enjoying it. I've only ever watched one episode of Skins (episode 9) so if I get anything wrong just let me know. Thanks again for the reviews.**

When I was little I used to be the star attraction at Mums 'gatherings'. I'd dance and sing for dried apricots, surrounded by clouds of smoke.

When I was ten I started to resent her for her unorthodox lifestyle. While the other little girls at school had Barbie's and the latest computer gadgets I would arrive with hand sewn clowns and holes in my shoes. It was hard to fit in and I guess that's when I decided that I never wanted to fit in ever again.

By my early teens I had inherited Mums liberal beliefs. I wanted to save the world. I wanted to ensure that donkeys got all the recommended breaks. I wanted to spread the message of equality. Now in a strange way, it kind of feels like I am.

"I'm scared," I admit looking at myself in the wardrobe mirror. Is it possible to age in a month? I look older to me.

"It's fine" Emily mumbles somewhat distractedly, slipping her feet in to a pair of heels. She's wearing a black dress that she's been umming and ahhing over for hours. Is it too simple? Is it too short? If you ask me it's not short enough. It's all about the legs. "Oi cheeky" She chuckles with that dirty deep laugh of hers.

"What?" I ask innocently.

"I thought you were scared?"

"I am!" I insist sitting beside her with a perfectly exaggerated sigh. "Looking at your legs just eases the pain" I add, resting my head in my hands. I let my bottom lip slip out into a pout.

"Why are you scared?" She asks, her radiant smile slipping into her words.

"Are you sure that were ready for this? For this very public outing?"

She looks at me with one raised eyebrow. "Your kidding right? I only ask because I don't think you can get more public than the prom"

She has a point. "But this is planned Ems. Organised."

"It's just a party babes"

"I like the way that sounds. That can stay. But this is not just a party. This is Katie's party. KATIE. You know your evil twin?"

"C'mon she's not evil. Not all the time anyway and she did invite us both. That's progress. Isn't it?" She argues but it's lost on me I'm already imagining the morons who are going to point and stare.

"I just. I'm just nervous"

The heavy pounding bass penetrates the floorboards with an irritating reminder. 'Were not going anywhere' it mocks me. Since when do I have stage fright?

The house is full to bursting point. The Neanderthals play drinking games in the kitchen with what looks like somebody's garden hose. Orange girls titter around on heels drinking themselves into oblivion. I'm not sure Katie knows any of these people but then there she is standing in the thick of it, loving all the attention. I guess this is her come back.

We drink from a bottle of vodka that we found in the freezer. It's the cheap kind that's like paint thinner on your throat. I take a gulp and shudder as it runs down my throat, as cold as ice.

"Do you know anybody?" I ask handing her the bottle.

"Not really but Katie seems to be having a good time" She remarks, throwing a glance in Katie's direction. She's apparently the prize in the drinking competition. "Some things never change," She adds cynically.

"They will. It just takes time. Plus your proof that you can crack the hardest of nuts" I throw her a wink and it earns me a kiss. Her mouth is inviting. I linger there as long as I possibly can, slipping my fingers into her soft hair. I guess we forget where we are. Get caught up in the moment.

"Whoa!!! Better than strippers. Dude check out the entertainment," Some guy shouts to his friend. "Hey don't stop girls" He grins at us and I notice the faux tattoo on his oily chest. A phone number written in eyeliner. "Tease. Make with the fucking kisses already"

"Fuck off!" I snap, gripping Emily's hand tighter.

"Oooh the blonde bites" One of the guys remarks to his friend. "I'll take that one. I like it rough"

"Just try it limp dick," I snarl at them.

"Whoa!!" They laugh loudly. "Well maybe I'll take the red head. What do you say princess. Fancy the ride of your life?"

"I think I'd rather die" Emily replies. "Come on let's go," She tells me.

"Not so fast" The guy interrupts us, standing between the doorway and us. "Me and the guys want to see a show"

"This isn't a show!" Emily protests, waving our hands in the air. "She's my girlfriend"

"Do you want some meat for the filling?" One of the morons asks nudging his friends and laughing loudly.

"Oi knobhead do you want to fuck off out of here?" Katie interjects pushing the naked chested guy into a lamp. "Their together so have some respect and get the fuck out of my house"

"What? Come on Katie!"

"Coming into my house and harassing my sister!"

"If we would have known we never would have!" He insists much to everyone else's amusement.

"Genius their twins" I point out.

He looks at each of them and shrugs. "I don't see it" He remarks.

"Just get the fuck out. NOW!" Katie shrieks. Her sharp voice sends them out of the living room.

Emily and I share surprised glances. I could have taken them, I think to myself.

"Thanks Katie that was really sweet of you" Emily thanks her and tugs on her arm with a hand.

"Yeah thanks," I add as nonchalantly as I can. It's not easy to say thank you to someone you dislike.

Katie looks at us briefly. "Alright don't cry about it. Jesus" She walks away back into the chaos of the living room. Never let it be said that Katie can't be modest.

"She acknowledged us" Emily said her voice almost in awe.

"So?"

"So isn't that a good thing?"

I laugh. "Hardly" I remark downing more of the vodka.

"How can you say that?" She sounds hurt but I just can't give Katie the credit. Why should I when she tried so hard to keep us apart? "It's OK for you. Your Mum understands. So far Katie's the only one who does. Sure its in a warped, controlling, way but that's enough for me. She's still my sister Naomi"

I sigh which is really an admittance of defeat. "You're right. If it's that important to you then I promise to try. Now can we take this bottle upstairs and lighten the mood?" My lips curl into a smile. It's uncontrollable really, this smiling thing.

"That's the best thing you've said all day"

The candle that Emily lit flickers, madly, throwing shadows around the room like a strange carousel. An opened window lets in the late night wind. Out of the corner of my eye I can see Emily exhale a long stream of smoke that gets caught in the air. Her hands are all over the place thanks to the empty bottle and the crushed beer cans that litter the carpet.

"I'm cold" She whimpers her voice heavy from the weed and the drink. I sit behind her wrapping my arms around her stomach. She leans back against me and I can smell apples in her hair. Before we officially got together I'd snatch moments like this when she was asleep.

"Better?" I ask and she nods her head in response. "This is nice. Holding you is nice" I smile to myself. "I didn't think it would be, you know? I always thought I needed my own space" The thought makes me laugh. All those mornings when I wrenched myself out of that bed terrified of the idea of my own happiness. "Are you happy Ems?" I ask. "Ems?"

She's fast asleep snuggled into my arm. I smooth down her hair and kiss her brow. Do honeymoon periods have to time out?


	4. Chapter 4

Thanks again for all the lovely comments. I haven't really been writing with a plot in line so the chapters are pretty much just coming spontaneously. This chapter especially might seem a little sporadic but that's how I picture their relationship. Lots of up and downs ECT. Bear with me if you think it doesn't make sense. Thanks again x

Roundview College is looming. I can still remember when the weeks lay ahead of me invitingly. When I could sit back and breathe a sigh of relief because all I had to think about was the shape of Emily's face.

Now my mind is wandering down a much darker path. I'm thinking of gossip spreading like wildfire, of eyes that meet mine and then quickly look away, of the huge, massive statement just holding her hand in public is going to make.

You have to understand this isn't easy for me. I'm not supposed to need anyone. I'm not supposed to be in love. I'm supposed to be cold and snappy. I'm supposed to be a bitch. That was my security. My way of blocking the rest of the world out. Now I feel naked. Like love will somehow change the shape of my face or make me appear different in the eyes of others.

It's cold. My toes, I swear, have given in to frost bite. The roaring fire does little to dent the icy chill in the air and I begin to wonder whether it was such a good idea to come here. I feel irritated. My thoughts keep pestering me and I can tell that Emily feels as though I'm not really here. I try to focus on her, try to have fun. This is our last night after all, but it's no use I can sense an argument brewing.

Emily sighs, poking the fire with a stick. "What's wrong Naomi?" She asks.

"Nothing" I reply with a shrug, pushing my feet closer to the fire.

"Nothing?" She sounds dubious.

"That's right nothing" I can here the bite in my voice.

"Ok well I'll just sit here shall I? In the freezing cold, talking to myself. How are you? Pretty shitty actually. Oh really why? Well my girlfriend went catatonic about half an hour ago..."

"Piss off"

"No! Tell me what's wrong," She demands poking the stick into the fire for emphasis.

"Why do you have to know everything about me?"

"Because I love you and I don't want you to be unhappy"

I sigh loudly. "Your not supposed to use love as a weapon Emily. You can't just tell me you love me and expect me to spill all my feelings"

"So you are feeling something?"

I scowl at her. "It's nothing OK? I'm just a bit nervous about tomorrow that's all"

"Why?" The question is asked in a soft, hushed, voice which, rather than soothing me, only serves to irritate me.

"Why do you think?" I sound like the old me. I can see the same thought mirrored in her puppy dog eyes, which look, sad and wounded.

"I don't know" She replies looking into the fire.

"I'm not sure how I'm supposed to act," I admit with a sniff trying to sound like this isn't bothering me to the extent that it is.

She scrunches up her forehead. "What do you mean?"

"For fuck sake!" I rage standing up. "Isn't it obvious? I'm not the same Naomi anymore. I've got to be somebody else"

"So have I" She points out.

I turn away from her. "What are people going to say?" I ask aloud, partly to her and partly to myself.

"I thought you didn't care"

I shrug my shoulders. I feel myself shutting off from her.

My Mum told me once that I was lucky I had a nose left considering I cut it off to spite my face so often. I dig my heels in and stay put even if it means hurting myself in the long run because I can't accept that I might actually need help. Instead of telling her that I'm frightened and talking it through, I have to create an argument so that mentally I can tell myself I was right.

"Naomi!" She exclaims breaking me out of my thoughts.

"What?"

"Don't do this," She warns me.

"I'm not doing anything"

"Please don't ruin it," She urges me, placing a hand on my shoulder. "It's our last night"

When I turn around her face is framed with pain. Her eyes are wet with unshed tears and I feel myself crumble slightly. Part of me wants to hold her in my arms and forget everything but a bigger part of me feels angry that I need to be strong for her when I feel so painfully weak.

"Don't be angry," She pleads, slipping her arms around my reluctant neck. "It's going to be OK" She assures me nuzzling her face into my neck. I stiffen slightly at the contact despite the fact that it feels so good. If I just gave in and kissed her it could change everything.

"It's going to be ok?" I repeat. She nods her head looking up at me with a distant smile on her lips. "Do you promise?" I ask.

"Of course" She replies looking confused. I crush my lips to hers kissing her passionately. My fingers come to her hair and slip into the thick strands almost desperately. It feels like everything I'm feeling is being poured into the kiss. I nip at her bottom lip, taking her to the ground with me. "Naomi?" Emily gasps, no doubt confused by this sudden turn of events.

"Just shut up and kiss me," I tell her and I know that she will. I know that she'll do anything I tell her to because she loves me. She'd sacrifice her own happiness if it meant that I was OK.

I'm kissing her, my hands ripping at her clothes forcing there way under her shirt desperate to touch her naked skin. It's as though I can't control myself. This isn't the way things usually go and she knows it. Every so often I catch the surprise in her eyes when I bite at her neck or kiss her too harshly. My hands slip past the barrier of her waistband and I can see the mix of arousal and confusion on her face. Maybe she wants to ask me what's going on? I'm suddenly aware of the fact that she would continue even if she didn't want to. It brings to mind JJ and I stop suddenly, her kisses turning stale. I sit up.

"What's wrong? What is it?"

"Did you like that?" I ask her bitterly.

"Yeah. Why?" She's so confused.

Why can't I just take her face in my hands and kiss all the confusion away? But I can't. I feel sick.

"I need to get out of here," I announce standing up and brushing her off of me. Her mouth is agape and she's so shocked that for a moment she just watches me picking up my things.

"This is crazy!" She shouts hoping it will halt my actions but I walk away listening to her shout after me. She calls my name over and over again and the words feel like bombs exploding in my path.

'Go back' I keep telling myself, but I can't. I can't go back. My quick pace turns into a sprint and I run away choking on my own tears.


	5. Chapter 5

As always thanks for all the reviews they really help to keep me going when I have writers block. Thanks for reading and I hope you can make some sense of Naomi's actions

I bury myself under the covers. When I was a kid I used to think that my quilt had magical powers that would protect me from all the ghosts and ghouls that seemed to linger around my bed before I drifted off to sleep. I'd pull the covers right over my head leaving the tiniest hole to breathe from. It made me feel safe but in theory it just kept the boogeyman alive. My tears run freely down my cheeks. The sheets are wet but I don't care.

My mind slips back to the encounter in the woods and I shudder. She was so hurt. Every time the tears stop a picture of her returns to my mind and I well up. I did it to her again. Fled like I was fleeing the scene of a crime. I try to imagine how it must feel to be alone in those woods. To be left standing there, the warmth of our bodies still clinging to the blankets we had laid on.

I feel like my Father. It's a fear that has always been in the back of my mind. A fear of running from my problems. I'm running. I'm always running. Repeating history because I'm too scared to face the music.

My bedroom door creaks open.

"Fuck off!" I scream from beneath the covers. "This isn't a bleddy motel!"

The door opens and closes and I grit my teeth scrunching the sheets between two clenched fists. "Just so you know" I begin choking back more tears. "I am going to slay you. Do you understand?"

"No you won't" An all too familiar voice whispers. I stop moving becoming as still as a statue.

She sits down on the bed and we remain in silence for a while.

"What are you doing here?" I ask trying to hide the emotion that wells up in my throat.

"I'm not leaving so don't try and make me" She snaps.

"Well I'm not talking so you've had a wasted journey" I reply sounding like a petulant child.

She sighs. "I don't care. I just wanted to make sure you were alright," She tells me.

"Oh" The words come out without my consent and linger in the air. It reminds me of Panda's party. When she had slowly advanced on me, her mumbled requests little more than a quiet babbling in my ear. Her mouth had moved closer and closer until her lips brushed against mine and an 'Oh' had crept out of my lips. A single, astonished oh. Exactly the same kind of oh that had escaped just now.

"So are you? Alright?" She asked with a trace of irritation that jerked me from my daydreams.

I gasp for air trying to choke down the tears. I'm not even sure why I'm so upset. I'm not even sure where all of this is coming from. I'm not sure of anything except for the fact that she's here. She's still here always trying, always fighting for us.

"Erm no?" I choke the words out.

"For gods sake Naomi let me see your face," She demands, pulling on the duvet.

A sort of pathetic dual begins where I tug at the duvet and so does she. Easily she uncovers me and slips into my mini shelter. She pulls me around until I'm lying on my back and I close my eyes to block everything out. "Don't" She whispers her hands gently stroking my face. "Don't scrunch up your pretty face"

"I'm sorry" I practically mouth the words letting the softness of her fingertips calm me down.

She lies down beside me. "It's OK," She whispers into my ear. "You're bound to be nervous. We don't have to spend any time together. We can take it slowly. It's not like I expect you to hold my hand as we walk through the gates"

But I know that's probably what she daydreams of. "I'm just happy that were together. Sometimes I forget that it was difficult for me to come to terms with this too"

"That's not true," My voice sounds strange to my ears. "You're always thinking. Always thinking about me" I swallow hard. "You could never be forgetful. It's hard accepting that sometimes"

"Accepting what?"

"Accepting you"

"That's sad Naomi," She whispers tracing the outline of my chin.

"I know" I admit.

"All I want from you is a promise that you won't shut me out. You can be a twat as much as you like as long as you're my twat. OK?"

I chuckle. "I promise," I reluctantly agree knowing all to well that I am losing my battle by the second. Damn those puppy dog eyes and there ability to turn me to mush. I never could stay angry with her for long.

"Great" She beams at me. She sits back with her hands behind her head and sighs with great satisfaction. "You know babe I love it when I'm right"

I scowl at her poking her in the stomach. "Probably because it's such a rare occasion"

"I'll have you know I'm very smart actually" She tells me sticking her tongue out.

"I can see that" I say not at all convincingly.

"I got you to admit that you're a twat didn't I?" She grins at me and we keep eye contact before laughter erupts throughout the bedroom.

"I suppose you've got a point," I reluctantly agree pouting in defiance.

I drift in and out of sleep. When sleep does take me I have bizarre dreams that cause me to wake feeling startled and confused by the senseless movies that play out in my thoughts. I'm not sure what to make of any of them. My dreams find me walking down an unfamiliar path. I'm lost. Every so often familiar faces pop up. My Mum, my Dad even Katie. I try to talk to them but they don't seem to know that I'm there. Not even Emily seems to hear my voice. The thought frightens me and when I come to I'm relieved to find her face barely inches away from mine.

"Nightmare?" She asks sleep hanging from her voice.

"Something like that. Did I wake you?"

"No" She reassures me placing a kiss against my cheek. "Do you want me to leave Naomi?"

"No" I reply immediately. "I don't want to wake up without you," I confess, feeling emotional all of a sudden.

I think back to the woods, to all those harsh penetrating kisses. Without thought I bring my lips to hers kissing her slowly. The kiss awakens both of us and before I know what's happening I'm on top of her my mouth hungrily claiming hers. My tongue slips past her lips finding hers with a jolt of pleasure that brushes away any lingering doubts in my mind. She moans into me and we slip out of our clothes, resuming our position. The silky softness of her naked skin is a delicious reminder of other times we have shared, other kisses that have melted me. We can never be close enough. I'm always left wanting more of her. When she groans my name in my ear I almost lose control. I press my lips to her neck and it's all I can do not to scream out. The room becomes hot with our passion. I slip down the length of her, her soft moans ringing in my ears.


	6. Chapter 6

Hee hee. Oops. Sorry about the reposting of my first chapter. I don't know how that happened!

Thanks again for the reviews, they are always appreciated.

I've really enjoyed writing this but I'm not sure if there's much point continuing. I have a few little ideas but basically nothing more than nice moments between the two of them. We shall see. Thanks again

I dump the now diluted weetabix in the sink with a grunt and sit down at the kitchen table, making a big deal of scraping my chair against the floor.

"Somebody's grumpy this morning" Mum teases me ruffling my hair with a hand.

"Stop it!" I warn her shooting her the evil eye. "I like neat hair. Neat"

"I don't know how you put up with her?" Mum asks Emily and they share secret little smiles. Is there a law somewhere that says partners can only get along with parents by ganging up on their daughter/girlfriend?

"I'm a model citizen" Emily remarks with her sweetest of smiles. For a minute my sleep deprived brain wonders why I can't melt Emily's Mum's cold heart with one of my smiles?

"How can you not be tired?" I ask her, picking up an apple and taking a large bite out of it. I glare at the offending apple as I swallow hard. You are going to bear the brunt of my frustrations, I mentally tell it.

"I am" She responds with a shrug of her delicate shoulders.

"Well then why are you so bloody chirpy?" I demand to know tossing the half eaten apple onto the table.

She colors slightly and I find it beyond endearing. I watch as the blush creeps to her cheeks and turns them a rosy red. "You know why!" She whispers, her eyes seeking out my Mum suspiciously as she potters around the kitchen humming.

"I guess that's something" I sigh, leaning back in my chair. I feel her eyes on me and I look at her briefly gracing her with a crafty wink.

"Shouldn't you two get going? You'll be late for college"

The steps to the college doors have never looked so steep. I stand at the bottom of them with a sense of apprehension, as if I'm bracing myself for a mountain climb. Students mill around us looking like little flies that buzz in and out of view.

"How do you want to do this?" Emily asks me. She stands beside me looking rigid and awkward. The sight of her face that has gone pale with worry makes my stomach churn. I look down at her shoes to avoid her eyes and notice that there the little ballet pumps she's been wearing to death lately.

I think about the last time I remember her wearing them. We went to Brighton for the day and sat on the pebbled beach eating ice cream and collecting shells. We sat there for hours sitting next to the sea when the tide unexpectedly lunged forward and soaked us to our knees. She moaned all the way to the train station and when we arrived home I gave her a piggyback to the taxi so she'd finally shut up. I still carry a smoothed piece of glass, I found amongst the pebbles, in my back pocket. Sometimes when I'm nervous I rub it.

"Naomi?" She asks patiently.

"Were going to do it together" I reply firmly, deciding in that very moment that it was the right, no the only, thing to do.

I slip my hand into her willing hand and we climb the steps.

Inside I find that people barely bat an eyelid. Occasionally a pair of eyes will slip down and blink in surprise at our joined hands, but there's no lynch mob waiting for us with placards of hate and angry words. Nobody seems to care.

I guess Emily can sense the hornet's nest that's going on in my mind because she says nothing, just carries on walking with her head held high. I wonder what's happening in her mind. Are all of her sweet thoughts weighed down with thorns? Or does she finally feel free?

Loving somebody teaches you so much about yourself. Before Emily I thought needing somebody else was a sign of weakness, now I know it takes more strength, more guts, to make a relationship work. Making things work takes determination. You get inside your own head and you realise things like the fact that you concentrated on your own fears before even considering hers. Luckily love means she'll probably forgive you.

"Ok?" She asks when a girl whispers something into her friend's ear and points down at our joined hands.

"Problem?" I ask her my irritation palpable causing the girl to practically shrink to finger size. Her eyes go wide and she shakes her head. "Good" I smile with great satisfaction. "Come on Ems"

"My hero" Emily exclaims clutching my hand tightly. Briefly she rests her head against my shoulder and I kiss the top of her head. "I'm proud of you" Emily tells me as we reach her locker.

"Thanks Mum" I tease causing her to strike me with her bag.

"Cheeky! I'm trying to be sentimental you bitch. Don't know why I bother" She sighs but I can see the glimmer in her eyes.

"Because you love abusing me?" I offer sacrificing myself to another bag swipe. "Didn't realise you were into kink" I give her a wink, biting my bottom lip because I know that she loves it.

"Naomi!" She protests.

I chuckle to myself. "Ok, ok" I reason, holding my hands up for surrender. "No more naughtiness. Scouts honor"

"You were never a scout!"

"Could have been a scout," I mumble pulling my best grumpy face.

"Like I could have been a welder," She mutters under her breath, closing her locker and slipping her bag back onto her shoulder.

"Bitch" I answer back in the same hushed tone.

"You're the bitch!" She shrieks in that delightfully girl way. "My bitch" She adds.

I laugh loudly, stopping in my tracks to give her a disbelieving look. "I don't think so hun" I reply, sticking my tongue out at her. "I think we both know who wears the trousers in this relationship"

"Naomi were both wearing skirts," She reminds me, rolling her eyes.

"Well I'll be sure to always wear trousers from now on" I assure her and we both laugh together.

We reach the classroom and I give her a quick peck on the cheek before opening the door.

"Were you always this insane?" She asks and I shrug, glancing at her over my shoulder. She smiles at me and then I notice her eyes stray the other way.

When I look forward I see JJ trying to sit in his seat looking nervous and jittery. He looks at me with wide eyes like a deer awaiting it's fate of being smeared on a windscreen. He mumbles things under his breath and as we walk further into the room I hear him gasp "Fiddlesticks"


End file.
